What Not to Wear

“When I consider your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars, which you have set in place, what is man that you are mindful of him, the son of man that you care for him? You made him a little lower than the heavenly beings and crowned him with glory and honor.”
Ps. 8:3-5

I ponder the same question: In comparison to the majesty of your creation, O Lord, what is it about me that captures your attention? Another thought: how can He say after each thing He created, “it is good.” But only after He made man said,” It is very good.” (Gen. 1:31) The two are undeniably related. And both make me wonder since Christ can’t be mistaken, what have I not understood about myself?

This morning was not unlike any other. I sat with coffee in hand, staring out my large picture window, which over looks countless trees, blooming plants, roses galore, set against a perfectly clear sky flittered with sunbeams and talked with God. Some of my most meaningful conversations happen in this spot. Today was one of them. As I sat with Him pondering these very thoughts, I asked Him, Who am I to be considered lovelier than such things, to have your love, your devotion, your acceptance? (My mind has been in a terrible place these past few days, feeling rather unworthy of all I have hope and faith).

I hear Him say, “Don’t you realize you bear the image of my Son? When I see you, I see Him?”

I’ve heard it before. I want to believe but in my skepticism, I say, “but Lord, you know the things I have done, said, and thought. There is no beauty here to attract you to me.”

He understands and reminds me that He too, while on the cross bore much shame and had no beauty, that His own Father turned His eyes from Him. (Is. 53)

He says, “I have given you a new heart, Beloved. Take it, own it. Stop wearing that robe of shame and put on the robe of righteousness I bought for you.”

I sit with this conversation, debating Him—the Author and Perfector of my life. (Sounds absurd to say it like that and yet, it is truth) I tell him I’m unworthy, that I’ll dirty His robe. The conversation goes on like this for several more minuets.

I bet we all do this. We know we’re not worthy, so we don’t fully embrace the free gift of grace. We don’t get too attached…just in case it isn’t for real.

John Eldredge points out, “all this groveling and self-deprecation done by Christians is often shame masquerading as humility. Shame says, “I’m nothing to look at. I’m not capable of goodness.” Humility says, “I bear a glory for sure. It’s a reflected glory. A grace given to me.”

If we embraced grace fully, lived life robed in righteousness, as heirs to the King, with our glory revealed our lives would look differently don’t you think? To live in truth, to live knowing I am fully loved, accepted, and forgiven. What if I really believed it? It’s a scary place—to have such confidence, security, beauty (His glory reflected) here on earth. It’s my opinion that most Christians don’t live out of their Spirit-filled lives, that we are more in tuned with our sinful nature. Perhaps it’s because we are in the midst of a great battle; a battle not against flesh and blood but against the forces of the spiritual realm. (Eph. 6:12, paraphrased) The enemy’s plan from the beginning has been to make us doubt our hearts, take away our courage…in short, assault our hearts…which is the wellspring of life. (Prov. 4:23)

I forget constantly that we, as Christians, are to arm ourselves for this kind of battle, a battle that truly is a matter of life and death. Without a doubt, it’s more than we can handle on our own. I love how the Message Translations says, “Truth, righteousness, peace, faith, and salvation are more than words. Learn how to apply them.”

I do need to learn how to apply them. To be honest, I hardly understand their definition and exactly what they mean to me. It isn’t enough for me to simply go with the flow anymore. I think Satan has had me exactly where he wants me all these years: ignorant and dressed in shame.

I believe once I apply God’s armor (the list above), accept His love completely; I will see a glimmer of His son too, that I will embrace His glory reflected in me and stomp on the shame that I tend to choose over His righteousness. O that is my heart’s desire!

Christ says, “I have come to give you back your heart and set you free.”